Now, after my non surprising failure of freedom, it is a good time to briefly detail the bullshit one has to endure to get anything actioned while in 'hospital'.
Step 1) Call Mental Health Advocacy, not on the weekend as all calls are diverted basically to the same people (hospital emergency admission).
First I located the number for the Mental Health Consumer Workers in the 'Consumer Rights & Responsibilities' pamphlet . There were two numbers for the different areas/sectors. The first number rang out, the second had some recording which directed me to the acute/crisis team at another hospital. They stated they would contact the psychiatric unit I was staying at. The crisis team did indeed call back and this made the Evil Mr Bean nurse (the nurse who was present during my initial admission) come to the unit to inform me that the Mental Health Advocates would be informed of my concerns on Monday. I stated that I was not content just to hang around and wait for Monday, as it was early Saturday morning.
Anyway, a lot of hooha later I basically had my phone confiscated. The nurses (R and J) abused their so called authority and threatened me:
"Give us your phone or we'll call security"
You can probably guess what happened. I ran to the bathroom, locked myself in the shower cubicle and schemed about what to do next. I quickly jotted down the numbers I needed to call. Meanwhile, in the background, a plethora of bullshit flew from the nurses mouths.
"I smell smoke (we - as in the patients - like to smoke in the bathroom as it is banned) there might be a fire, you have to unlock the door because of OH & S"
"You are harassing the crisis team, they are only accessible to people in the 'outside' community (well it'd be handy if I had known that)"
"You keep calling people and harassing them" When I asked who, they said "this is not a discussion" and I said, "when did this become a dictatorial soliloquy" and of course silence was the answer, followed by a repetition of "this is not a discussion"
Step 2) Phone recovery plan. Monday morning bright and early I spoke to the Doctors (fucktards the lot of them). They reinstated my phone and even so graciously allowed me to send SMS and call people with it. Oh how generous. The nurse S (young, mouse like and completely patronising) even watched and read my SMS before I sent them out to ensure I didn't damage my 'reputation'. I was quite happy when I told her, "shut up S, you don't give a shit about my reputation".
Step 3) Go with the flow of the legal system. It's still bullshit, but I just wanted to see how far you can take it. The Magistrate hearing is held weekly every Tuesday. From what I gather, all patients have the right to access this service. We're provided with a solicitor from Legal Aid (part of Mental Health Advocacy service). Last year my solicitor drew on their shoe whilst taking with me, this year at least she listened and told me what to do next if the result wasn't to my satisfaction. And of course the result was not to my satisfaction, the hearing was adjourned for up to 14 days. WTF.
Step 4) Take it to the Mental Health Tribunal. Three idiots reside at the top, a lawyer, a psychiatrist and a community member, sounds like a bad joke. Three idiots make a decision, BAM, let's listen to the Doctor!
Step 5) Understand that the next step is to the Supreme Court, pfft, fat chance and a waste of my time, money and energy. So there ends the 'rights' journey of the person with a mental illness. Fascinating isn't it, aren't you glad I got to experience it first hand.
Step 6) Bludge off tax payers money, holidaying, while in hospital and write my damn book.
