I can't describe it as anything but a curse and a blessing.
e⋅piph⋅a⋅ny
/ɪˈpɪfəni/
a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.
And please, if you are reading this, or care about me or what is happening, please comment your thoughts or email me! I love you all and I can't wait to share it with you.

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